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Managing expectations dating

"Ideally, you should expect that you and your partner will feel closer at 10 months than you did at one month," Sadock tells Web MD.

Psychologist Dennis Lowe, Ph D, offers this advice to increase your odds of success: Think a little bit less about what you from the relationship and a little bit more about what you can bring to it.

So how do you keep yourself from expecting too much too soon?

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It was already known that serotonin levels drop in folks who have OCD. So, it was no surprise to find a low level of the transport chemical in this group.While some call the magic "limerence" -- that almost mystical connection of body, mind and spirit -- others say it's simply the most powerful sexual chemistry they ever experienced.Regardless of how you define it, experts say once we do experience the "high" it becomes etched in our brain.In fact, at least one aspect of this tantalizing chemistry lesson was recently proven by a group of Italian researchers.In this study, doctors looked at three groups: The first was patients diagnosed but not yet treated for obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD); the second group was couples who were newly in love; the third group was composed of "normal' people.Both partners should give more of themselves and expect more in return.As such, she says it's reasonable to expect that you will not only begin to spend more time together, but also give more to each other emotionally."When you think of the traditional marriage vows when people are pledging to honor and cherish, they talk a lot about what they are going to give to the relationship.Today, when people talk about a relationship they often talk in consumer terms -- like what am I going to get out of this, and what are you going to do for me," says Lowe, founding director of the Center for The Family at Pepperdine University in California.The bad news is this surge of delicious brain chemistry doesn't last.Fortunately, however, while all this passion is stirring in our brain, a slightly different state of mind is brewing elsewhere in our psyche -- a purely psychological phenomenon that experts call "bonding." "When the initial brain chemistry involved in the 'honeymoon' phase is over -- which it eventually is -- the bonding kicks in, a feeling of closeness and 'coupling' that actually helps keep the man and the woman together over time," says Sugrue.

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